IT’S
HERE! Y2K! THE YEAR 2000! THE NEW MILLENNIUM! NOTHING
HAPPENED. COMPUTERS DIDN’T CRASH AND BANKS DIDN’T FAIL.
PEOPLE DIDN’T RUN WILD IN THE STREETS AND THE WORLD DIDN’T
COME TO AN END. ALL THOSE PEOPLE RUNNING AROUND SHOUTING “
THE SKY IS FALLING, THE SKY IS FALLING “ LIKE A CHICKEN
LITTLE WERE WRONG!
AND
BOY, AM I GLAD. I’VE GROWN QUITE FOND OF MY LITTLE
COMPUTER. I LEARN SOMETHING NEW TO DO WITH IT EVERY WEEK.
LIKE LAST WEEK I LEARNED HOW TO SEND PICTURES OVER THE
INTERNET WITH MY STORIES. I HAVE EMAIL PEN PALS ALL OVER
THE WORLD. SOME IN AUSTRALIA, INDIA, PHILIPPINES, SWEDEN,
CANADA, MEXICO, GERMANY AND ALL OVER THE UNITED STATES. I
SEND THESE PEN PALS A COPY OF ONE OF MY STORIES ONCE IN A
WHILE AND NOW I CAN SEND A PICTURE OF SOMETHING IN THE
STORY.
I WAS
TELLING MY DAUGHTER, SUSAN, ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO SEND
PICTURES WITH MY STORIES AND SHE SAID, “BOY DADDY, YOU’VE
COME FROM A ROTARY DIAL TELEPHONE TO BEING A COMPUTER GEEK
IN SIX MONTHS.” -----"A COMPUTER GEEK!" I DON’T KNOW
WHETHER TO SMACK HER OR SAY THANK YOU. I DON’T KNOW WHAT A
COMPUTER GEEK IS. YOU KNOW CHILDREN CAN BE A GREAT COMFORT
IN YOUR OLD AGE. BUT THEY HELP YOU GET THERE FASTER TOO.
I KNOW
HOW TO GET IN A YAHOO CHAT ROOM AND THIS IS WHERE I HAVE
ACCUMULATED SUCH A LIST OF EMAIL PEN PALS. I DO HAVE MY
PROBLEMS IN THE CHAT ROOM THOUGH. WHEN I START CHATTING
WITH SOMEONE THAT HAPPENS TO BE FEMALE, THE FIRST THING THEY
WANT TO KNOW IS A/S/L. IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO LEARN WHAT
THAT MEANT. IT MEANS AGE/SEX/LOCATION.
THE
FIRST TIME I WAS ASKED A/S/L AFTER I KNEW WHAT IT MEANT, I
SAID 68/M/TX. THE YOUNG LADY HUNG UP ON ME! WELL---I
DIDN’T KNOW BUT MAYBE SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM OR
SOMETHING. ANYWAY I DIDN’T THINK ANYTHING ABOUT IT. THE
NEXT YOUNG LADY I P Med ASK ME A/S/L. I ANSWERED 68/M/TX.
SHE HUNG UP. I THINK MAYBE THESE GIRLS DON’T LIKE TO TALK
TO PEOPLE FROM TEXAS.
AFTER
THREE MORE HANG UP’s , IT BEGINS TO SOAK IN. IT’S NOT TEXAS
THAT’S CAUSING THEM TO HANG UP. IT’S THE 68 YEARS OLD!
BOY, NOW I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE A DINOSAUR. BUT I JUST
CAN NOT BRING MYSELF TO LIE ABOUT MY AGE. SO NOW WHEN THEY
ASK ME A/S/L, I ANSWER,” I’M A MALE FROM TEXAS AND IF I TOLD
YOU MY AGE YOU WOULD HANG UP ON ME. THEY ALL SAY, "OH NO I
WON’T HANG UP. WHAT IS YOUR AGE, REALLY?" I SAY, “WHAT
DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE, WE ARE JUST CHATTING ?” THEY SAY,
“BECAUSE I REALLY WANT TO KNOW.” I FINALLY GIVE IN AND SAY,
“I’M 68 YEARS OLD.”
SILENCE---SILENCE---SILENCE. I TYPE , ARE YOU STILL THERE?
NO ANSWER. DADGUM ANOTHER HANG UP ! I THINK, I REFUSE TO
HAVE A BATTLE OF WITS WITH AN UNARMED PERSON AND GO OFF AND
PLAY A GAME OF SOLITAIRE. BUT THAT’S A WHOLE NOTHER STORY
FOR A DIFFERENT TIME.
I HAVE
BUILT A FAMILY WEB PAGE. I WONDER WHAT MY DAUGHTER WILL
CALL ME NOW.
COPYRIGHT
2000
