Martha Stewart vs a Real Woman
Martha Stewart Says:
If you accidentally over-salt a dish
while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the
excess salt for an instant "fix me up."
Real Women Say:
If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's
just too bad.
Please recite with me the "Real Women's" motto:
"I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how
bad it tastes."
Martha Stewart Cure for headaches:
Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your
forehead. The throbbing will go away.
Real Women Say:
Take a lime, mix it with tequila, etc., chill and
drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?
Martha Stewart:
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar
cone to prevent ice cream drips.
Real Women:
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone,
for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up,
eating it anyway.
Martha Stewart:
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the
bag with the potatoes.
Real Women Say:
Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix and
keep it in the pantry for up to a year.
Martha Stewart:
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan,
use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess
on the outside of the cake.
Real Women:
Go to the bakery. They will even decorate it for you.
Martha Stewart:
Brush some beaten egg white over pie
crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
Real Women Say:
The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include
brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don't do it.
Martha Stewart:
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex
dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars
easy.
Real Women Say:
Go ask the very cute neighbor to do it.
And finally...the most important tip:
Martha Stewart:
Don't throw out all that leftover
wine. Freeze into ice cubes for
future use in casseroles and sauces.
Real Women Say:
Leftover wine????????
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